Sticks And Stones

On tour in “the luscious land of New Zealand,” British comedian Ed Byrne writes his weekly column for Metro. “They’re a bit fed-up at the moment over here: earthquake-ravaged Christchurch continues to be a drain on resources; Rena, the container ship that’s been stuck on a reef off the coast for three months, is spilling all manner of crap on to the shore; and now, to add insult to injury, they’re getting slagged off by BBC Radio Sheffield’s Breakfast Show. [New Zealanders] don’t mind you talking the p*** out of them if you come here and do it to their faces. That’s the thing about Kiwis. It’s only when you slag them off from a radio station in Sheffield that they really get the hump.”